(I originally posted this on Facebook for Windows 7, same rules apply) Microsoft is preparing to release their next version of Windows Operating system this fall. Given the insufficient number of versions available for Windows Vista, I thought I might make some suggestions for more configurations. Everyone loves choice, so we should have more choices! This is partly inspired by the new Windows Basic edition which will purportedly restrict the number of apps one can run to 6 or something.

After studying this issue over time I have compiled a list of dos and don'ts for maximizing the life and use of your lithium ion battery in your phone, tablet or laptop:

Consider this bit of trivia: the average salary of an actor is comparable to the average salary of an accountant; however, few if any accountants are unemployed in their line of work, but few make 6 figure incomes. Almost none make 7 figures. Compare this to actors.

A recent letter to the editor in the Pioneer Press decried the proposed seatbelt law in Minnesota that would allow police to ticket someone solely on the grounds of not wearing a seatbelt as a grave assault on our liberty. The problem with this "freedom from restraint" is it doesn't take into account the responsibilities that come with freedom. 

Per the United Federation of Planet's Starfleet Quartermaster Report 2369.623 new uniforms for crew will be issued over the next 6 Earth months and destributed to all star bases for retrieval for starships on mission. Starships will retrieve the new uniforms during the regular resupply schedule. The uniforms, in conforming with the styles for crew identifying as female, standard work uniforms for men shall be short shorts with the following dimensions:

I detest all hot "cocoa" mixes that only require hot water. I was reading the ingredients of one such mix the other day. They are quite interesting: sugar, modified whey, non-fat dry talcum powder, essence of cocoa (observed), vermiculite, partially hydrogenated conceptual art, carriage bolts, and artificial limbs. The sugar-free variety came with an "FDA Drug Facts" sheet. These hot cocoa "treats" are convenient at church social hours and ski lodges where providing a percolator with hot water is much easier than having to provide hot milk.

When we are advertising for new renters at our house we get some interesting submissions (happily we are at capacity right now). These messages are always from scammers, but responding to them has become a form of artistic expression for me. I am not exactly sure why anyone would ever buy into this. Of course,  greed and lust are pretty good intoxicants.... 

Hi Lisa,

Brilliant, but bodyless beings speak as through reverb. They take over the bodies of Kirk, Spock, and Dr. Ann Mulhall. Will Kirk and Ann kiss? Will the reverb continue throughout the show? Will the captain be murdered? Can disembodied minds survive in human bodies without kissing. Specifically the bodies of Kirk and Mulhall? Will we learn of the theatrical notion of Deus ex machina? Tune in on Friday at 7 PM, Channel 5. 

Federation outpost Cestus III has been destroyed. Kirk, Bones, McCoy and three other guys of no consequence beam down on the planet. Spock identifies cold-blooded life forms. Kirk and Spock use blue bocce balls as improvised grenades. A lone survivor, covered in silly putty, relates the story of the attack on the outpost. Has the Enterprise been drawn into a trap? This episode explores deep questions such as What makes humans unique? What is the Gorn? What can't latext do?

Friday, 7 PM, Channel 5

Kirk, Uhura, and Chekov are kidnapped into slavery by multicolored disembodied brains who like to gamble on gadiatorial games. A creepy fellow who has a built-in reverb speaks instructions from the brains in stilted English. Kirk proves to the brains that they have confused humans with chimpanzees. Kirk kisses a silver bikini-clad slave woman.

Friday, 7 PM, Channel 5

Kirk, McCoy and Spock land on a planet almost identical to the Earth, save for the Roman Empire remained in power into the 20th century. Will the sexual tension between McCoy and Spock finally be resolved? Will there be an awkward reference to Christianity? Tune in to find out!

Friday, 7 PM. Channel 5. 

An enormous single-celled organism threatens the crew and possibly the galaxy. Will Kirk pull a clever solution out of his butt at the last minute?  Will Scotty protest that the ship can't handle it? Will Spock risk his life for logical reasons that annoy Dr. McCoy? Tune in to find out. 

I wonder if entrance exams with their "one right answer" design tend to have a negative effect on academic research. Do they tend select for people who believe there is one right answer to any question?  Do people who prefer certainty over ambiguity do better on such exams? Much of the research at the academy is also based on winning grant money. What kind of effect on the quality of research might this have?

There is a logical fallacy called the argumentum ad ignorantiam or the argument from ignorance. The essence of this fallacy is that because we don't know something to be definitively false, it must therefore be true. A good example relates to concern about the dangers of electromagnetic frequencies.

Friday, 7PM, Channel 5

Klingons have introduced flintlock rifles to the peaceful humanoids of Neural, most of whom wear ridiculous wigs. Kirk battles a giant plush toy with poison fangs. A sexy woman seduces Kirk with herbs. Will Spock recover from a pierced liver?

7 PM Friday, Channel 5

Kirk, McCoy, and Spock beam down in Northern California. They need to deflect an asteroid or something. Dr. McCoy continues to shout during even normal conversation. Kirk is murdered by peaceful natives, who do not appear to have command of their own language. A Federation inquest determines that sending the most valuable members of the command crew on away teams is a very bad idea. Will Kirk be killed more?

When people first think of gluten-free foods they think of dishes that would have gluten-based grain, but have had it substituted with epoxy or gypsum. Or they think of rice porridge with a raisin (maybe two). Or perhaps they think of some exotic dish that makes you choke because it is made of puree of okra with xanthan gum, adzuki beans and durian wrapped in oak leaves. (And stored under the deck for 3 weeks in August). Served on a nest of undercooked quinoa.

I was at the drug store today to pick up some vitamin D. Living in the dark, cold north requires a bit of extra vitamin D. My levels are particularly low. The label said that any claims on the vitamins had not been evaluated by the FDA for efficacy in the treatment, prevention, or amelioration of any disease. Most of the vitamins on the shelf had doses that were ridiculously high. Being a relatively unregulated market, how does one determine whether the pills will do anything at all or worse, do something bad to you.

I recently heard Missouri voters rejected the insurance mandate in the new federal health care act. Perhaps the mandate is unconstitutional, but if that is the case, the right-leaning Supreme Court will overturn it. This got me to thinking however, maybe libertarianism might be the solution after all, we'd just need to make some adjustments to some of our cultural values. 

So here goes: 

Oh, it seemed so clever, but as soon as I got my computer up and running, the thought fell right out of my head. So here's the query: do you know what it was?